About Mario

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Born and raised in Los Angeles, Mario Piumetti is a freelance writer of science fiction, horror, screenplays, and nonfiction. He has a bachelor's degree in English from California Lutheran University and an MFA in creative writing from Antioch University. An avid music lover, his work is heavily influenced by rock, punk, and metal. You can contact him at mario.piumetti.writer@gmail.com.

Sunday, August 26, 2012


In case any of you wondered what it was I wrote at the Forging Creativity into Fiction Craft seminar at the UCLA Writers Fair, here it is.  It isn't Pulitzer Prize material - I scribbled it on the back of a page - but I still felt pretty good about the burst of inspiration I had while writing it.  I just hope I can tap into that again in the future.

Enjoy, or tear apart.  This was really just a quick ten-minute assignment...

I looked down at Samantha.  She was shocked as though I'd just finger-banged her cat.

"Why do I have cheese in my pocket?" she asked.

I shrugged.  "I dunno.  What else have you got?"

Samantha sifted through her pocket, taking out each item and examining it.

"Lint, obviously," she said.  "My car keys, your whiskey flask -"  She paused to take a deep swig of it, and then tossed it back empty to me.  "- and this cheese."

I looked at her hand and saw a long, soft cheese stick white and fat like a termite queen.  It was strange since she: A) was allergic to cheese, and B) hated even the sound of the word.

"Maybe it's a new sex toy?" I said.

"Yeah, that's it," she said.  "I got tired of banging my husband, so goddamn CHEESE is the next best thing.  Jesus!  I'd turn lesbian in a heartbeat and hook up with Bea Arthur's corpse before sticking this thing in me!"

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