This week has exhausted me. After last week's work collapse, I felt like I had to play catch-up in order to keep up with my writing goal for NaNoWriMo. Not only did I have to put in my six daily pages, I had to write an additional six pages Monday through Thursday in order to make up for the lost pages.
That doesn't sound too bad when you work out the numbers on paper, but actually getting it done in real life is another story. I hate write first drafts. Lord, I don't know how many times I've told you guys that. Sometimes, I can get ten pages out in a flash. The words flow so naturally. Other times, I can barely write a paragraph. It's frustrating.
So imagine my frustration when I had to write thirty pages yesterday and couldn't bring myself to write until late in the evening! I was so dead tired that I had AC/DC's It's A Long Way To The Top playing on repeat. Bon Scott's bagpipes solo was like a defibrillator jump-starting me for at least ten minutes.
Finally, this morning, I said to hell with it. My NaNoWriMo schedule has been dented, and I'm not going to be able to catch up. That's not to say that I've given up on NaNoWriMo or Ain't No Grave or anything like that. Rather, I've given up on stressing out over the pages that pile up. I'm just going to accept the fact that I tripped and won't be able to sprint my way out of this.
The alternative is to constantly deprive myself of sleep, and the result is sloppy, incoherent writing that I'll have to redo anyways. It's not worth the agony.